cracked me up.

Things are going quite well with the guy I mentioned in my Nov. 24 post.  Well enough, in fact, that I’ve stopped pursuing additional online dates.

 

I sent the following to someone who had “winked” at me on one of the sites:

Hi. Thanks for winking. I recently started seeing someone that I met here on match and thus am “off the market.” I wish you the best of luck in your search!

His response?

Ok Cool but u can always come back to me if u get dumped

matched to an ex.

Just got an email from an ex.  (We’re still good friends.)  Seems he just joined one of the dating sites I’m on, and it suggested me as a highly compatible match.  Not super surprising, given the sort of matching system the site uses, but entertaining just the same.  Not sure whether this should give me more or less faith in the site’s matching algorithm.  :-)

paying it forward.

Got this from a 21-year-old. A little young for me, but so very sweet!

Anyone ever tell you that you’re completely adorable? I’m sure you get it all the time, but I just thought I’d let you know.

putting my oar in.

A message I sent a while back in response to a profile.  Couldn’t resist.

hey, i read your profile with interest, and was thinking that you sound like a great guy, and then i saw that you’d selected a few, very specific, racial/ethnic preferences in your ideal date. is there a particular reason you don’t want to date a black woman? i’m not black, but i do eliminate people who appear racist on their profile from my dating pool. that said, you seem like such a nice guy that i kind of wondered what your rationale might be for stating your preferences in the way you did.

i’m probably poking my nose in where it doesn’t belong, and i’m sorry if this email offends, but i really am curious…

Not surprised that he never responded, but I was honestly curious to hear his reasons.

an odd message to initiate contact.

Eating Indian at [one of Edater's favorite restaurants] is just low.. especially when you could have home-made authentic Indian without all that oil.. been cooking foods from scratch since I was 9.. I would kid a girl about that! Besides.. last I went towards [Edater's city], the men out there seem to be from another planet- cuckoo birds. All sorts of unnecessary small-talk and forced fake laughter. It would take those oompa loompa a lot longer to find you while you stood right in front of them, than it would take you to ride a mule over to the Republic of Silicon Valley!

Avoid those clowns, young woman, go wild wild west. The Voices have spoken.

-The Voices, obviously

Well, he certainly did read my profile, but still, a very odd message.  I doubt it’s ever a good idea to talk about “the voices” speaking in an email to someone you’ve never met. I mean, I’m wondering if those voices speak to him on a regular basis….

stupid, mean, or crazy.

Just got the following message, first contact, he initiated:

why are you so fucking ugly, they should forbid ugly people from signing up to this website

Hmmm.

If he thinks this is an effective neg (a pick-up technique), he should reread The Game as I believe the technique requires a compliment that is actually an insult.

If he’s having a bad day and just wants to spread the hate, then I hope it made him feel better.

And just in case he has plans to bury me in his backyard alongside the other bodies, I promptly blocked him from accessing my profile. At least I hope I did. I’m checking to make sure.

Creepy.

so much for meeting *new* people online

I joined a new dating site this week. (It’s what I do when I can’t face the ones I’m already on.) This one is free. And it makes you answer a lot of questions before it then tries to match you with compatible people.

It took me a while to answer enough questions to make it worthwhile to check out their matching system. I finally gave it a try today. #5 on the list (ordered according to the site’s measure of compatibility) was a colleague of some close friends that I’d already met about a month ago (in the real world) and quickly became friends with myself. Just had dinner with him last night, in fact.

Hilarious.

So much for meeting new people online. And so much for their matching system, if it’s going to match me up with people in exclusive relationships. Regardless of how compatible we may or may not be in other ways, that is certainly a deal-breaker.

(Just so you don’t judge him unfairly, he’s on the record as looking for “new friends” only.)

grrrrrrrr. another one!

This one committed two of edater’s cardinal sins.

First, he “winked.”
Then, when I broke my own rule of ignoring winks and clicked on his profile, he only had the following:
“I cycle, hike, travel, build, fix, teach, play, camp, canoe, commute, compute, bake, dance, sing (where no on hears), run, read science fiction, sit by the fire, watch (movies), read science fact, talk, and listen.” Sans photo. Points for conciseness, but more info needed.

(Geeez! I just wasted about 45 seconds!)

a comment that deserves a post of its own

A reader writes,

OK, I can’t top the gross-out factor [of this earlier post], but I did have a first date show up during a busy dinner hour at a popular local coffee/dinner spot in a big curly wig and dark glasses after I told him I wanted to be a bit on the down low because of our student-populated small town. He was like 6′2 so everyone in the place turned and stared at us.

Ah, good times…

another of edater’s pet peeves

Just received. Email communication, initiated by “potential match”

Subject line:

hello!

Text:

hi my name is xxx. whats yours?

Profile:

Am an affectionate, faithful, God fearing, hopeless romantic thats very honest, loving, opened minded, & hispanic male. Seeking a fun, funny lady that can tame my serious side. With the same qualitys.

That’s it. There are two photos, and he’s filled in education and income. Nothing else. Hmmm. And I’m supposed to decide that he’s worth meeting up with based on…what, exactly? That he’s brave enough to buck social conventions like spelling?

Another piece of advice for those in the e-dating scene: don’t initiate communication unless you have a relatively complete profile. Guys seem to do this a lot, and it’s just silly. Happy dating!